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Saturday 30 November 2013

Movie Buff Engineers

These interactions are between a developer and technical architect. Comparing them with Sarfarosh movie's Inspector Salim and ACP Rathod conversations 
 

ARCHITECT: Kaise ho developer? 

DEVELOPER: Thik hun Sir. Yeh document dene ke liye aaya thaa. 
ARCHITECT: To tum is module pe kaam nahi karoge. 
DEVELOPER: Nahi Sir 

ARCHITECT: Aur yeh aapka faislaa hai ?

DEVELOPER: Faislaa karney wala main kaun hotaa hun sir.Faislaa to aap bade log kartein hain. Ek javascript bug mere module mein nikal aataa hai, aur saarey project team mein khusar pusar shuru ho jaati hai. Aur mujhe us module se hataa diya jaataa hai. Kyun. Kyun ke main developer hun. Aur aaj aapka project crash ho jaata hai, koi kuch nahi bol rahaa.Kyun, kyun ke aap Technical Architect ho. Ek badi post pe hain. Aur kisi bade baap ke bĂȘte hain. 


ARCHITECT: Technical Architect. Badaa baap. Aap jaante hain mere pitaaji ko. Who mere pitaaji hain. Puchhiye unsey main kaise banaa Technical Architect. bataa nahi paayenge aapko. Barso se khaamosh hain. Aur woh meri bhabhi hain. Tester hain. Puchhiye unse woh kaise bani Tester.
Humdardi ke liye kah rahaa hun. Lekin aap suniye. Technical Architect banane ke liye, jee tod mehnat ki hai maine. MBA ke liye chunaa gayaa thaa. Project Manager bankar aaraam ki jindagi guzaar saktaa thaa. Lekin maine MCA chunaa. Kyun. Kyun ki har project bug free dekhnaa chaahtaa hun. Aur main yeh aapse is liye nahi kah rahaa hun ke yeh mere module ka maamlaa hai. Nahi. Yeh mere project ka mamla hai. 


DEVELOPER: mere project ka nahi hai? 


ARCHITECT: shaayad nahi hai. Isi liye aap apni jimmedariyon se bhaag rahein hain. Main is project ko apna project samajhtaa hun. Aur apnaa project bachaaney ke liye mujhe kisi developer ki jarurat nahi hai.

Few days later: ...................

ARCHITECT: Tum is module mein kya kar rahey ho Developer? 


DEVELOPER: kyun? Koi paabandi hai? Isi script ko dhundh rahey ho naa aap. Nahi mili naa. Agar mil bhi gayee to kya hoga? Aapko to bug fix karke chahiye naa? Yeh li jiye. Mil jaayegaa aaj. Database mein. Jaiye. Fix kar lijiye usko. 


ARCHITECT: Ruko Developer. Meri baat suno. 


DEVELOPER: aur kya sunayenge. Ab nahi sunugaa. De to diya aapko bug fix karkey. Aur kya chahiye. Jaaiye bachaaiye apne project ko. Ab meri kya jarurat hai.


ARCHITECT: jarurat hai Developer. Is project ko bachaaney ke liye mujhe ek nahi, 10 Developer ki jarurat hai. 

DEVELOPER: 10 nahi sir, 10 hazaar milenge. Agar aap bharosaa karenge to.
Meri baat suniye Sir. Phir kabhi kisi Developer se mat kahnaa ye project uskaa apna project nahi.


ARCHITECT: nahi kahungaa, kabhi nahi kahungaa.  

Courtesy - Some one on Gmail :)

Monday 25 November 2013

Drinks and Demos

Recently I been to Yahoo Apps Demo event called “Drink and Demos” organized by Yahoo and managed by Text100 at Blimey, 1 MG Road Mall. This event was meant to showcase some new Yahoo Products and enhanced version of some of their already existing applications to bloggers and Tech Enthusiasts.There were totally 4 demos including Flickr, Yahoo Search, Yahoo Mail and new Yahoo Weather App. Out of these My Favorite was Yahoo Weather which comes for every platform on mobiles and for PCs. For Flicker total space available for a user has been increased to 1 TB and that’s hell lot of space even for a Professional Photographer to consume. Yahoo Search got enhanced in image search feature where now you can original aspect of an image searched in thumbnail format too , means the small size result will show how to image will look when it’s in actual size and that’s a nice feature to have .

Then next comes New Yahoo Mail, the measure enhancement in this is you can set background images as Theme and also you can see one conversation in a group ( that I have seen in outlook but not in Gmail yet) , so it’s a measure enhancement as far as I think . The last app demo was for Yahoo Weather app and its nothing but just a fabulous app. The way it’s different from other weather apps is you can see the images of a city for which you want to know the weather at a particular time. These images are submitted by the Users who live or been in those cities. E.g. you might see MG road pic if you are looking for a Temperature of Bangalore in the Late Evening time and these images are dynamic so it makes your experience much better than seeing just weather in a normal weather app. It shows 24 hrs. temperature of that given day on hourly basis and it forecasts next 10 days weather for you which has been quite accurate as I was told by Rashmi the lady who was showcasing this app to us, so it’s A MUST TRY APP for all of us and its size is just 10 MB for android phones that I am using. You can also set notifications on your android phone if you want this app to show you weather continuously .I have used for last 2 days now and it’s living up to my expectations so far .

These demos were followed my AWESOME Comedy show by Tanmay Bhat and then the dinner , and yeh in meanwhile Drink was also going though it was just a Drought Beer and Juice as expected for any Tech Meets :). For me it was one useful evening to know the Technology bit better and meet some of people who are driving these Technology changes.